I was going to write something else. Actually, I’m not even sure I was going to write anything, but then I read E’s post. 😦 http://eziaha.com/2013/08/03/dear-diary-august-the-3rd-2013/
I know she’s okay, and I know that by His Grace, her story will definitely end like the one I wrote yesterday(https://ebonycynic.wordpress.com/2013/08/02/my-love-story/). I was very touched though, saddened really, and I think I have to start some intense fasting so this doesn’t crop up for me too. I know it did for my parents, and somehow, it’s still an issue in my dad’s extended family. Tribalism.

Whether we admit to it or not, we all are guilty of tribalism. I myself admit that I’m not a great fan of the Igbo culture, mostly because I’ve witnessed firsthand their bone-deep disdain for other tribes, especially the Yorubas. I know this, ‘cos I schooled in Eastern Nigeria for 5 years. Added to this is my dad’s extended family, as I already mentioned. Imagine their absolute horror when their first-born son brought home a Yoruba woman to marry. Trust me this horror hasn’t faded one bit. Hold up. Did I say disdain? It’s more like hatred. Deep hatred.

I found out that Igbos actually have far more hatred for Yorubas than Yorubas have for Igbos. I asked and asked until I found out that the genesis of the issue was the Biafran war. Well, this is how I see it: the Americans also had a civil war. However, I don’t think I’ve ever heard of a Texan disallowed from marrying a lady from Virginia. Do you see my point? I do not know what it is about Nigerians that makes them think that poisoning the minds of future generations is a way to live. I know of a lot of marriages that have been destroyed because one person is from the ‘wrong’ place. It’s sad. Very sad.

There’s a lot more in my head to spill, but I doubt I can put it all down without stirring up strife. Hard enough to find a good, loving partner one is compatible with, who is God-fearing as well, now we have to impose tribal limitations too. I’m not blaming any particular tribe here. I’m saying what I know. I know Yorubas that will never allow an Igbo person into their house. Truth is though, this occurrence is more often vice versa. God help us all.

I just…I just hope I never have to read a story like E’s ever again. More than that, I pray I don’t find myself in such a situation. I hope I’ve not offended, but I’m pretty upset. Well, actually, I hope I’ve offended, enough for you to see my way of thinking. Once again, May God help us all.

About Jae Pearl

Cynical pretty nerd.

2 responses »

  1. E' says:

    Worth it oo
    Well I pray you don’t too but if you do sweetie I pray you find cushioning grace to see you through…
    Might require some radicalities but hey…
    It all ends in praise so long as tz the right person and time too.
    Loved reading this… sorry my story made you sad… Looooool

  2. E' says:

    Like you I am NOT a fan of igbos at all
    Chimamanda is the only reaon I still have an igbo name loooool.
    And yes ooo I think they hate more on the yorubas than the yorubas. Too sad the things I heard. At some point they moved from annoying to downright hilarious.
    Biafran war happened a billion years ago… history wan spoil future ni…
    Not mine sha…
    Like you said finding that special one is woek enough. To now fight external forces is not…

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