A flight to remember


For a day that started not so well, one that had a headache riding shotgun throughout, today was….pretty darn good!

From Arsenal’s loss(you can’t find me to beat me up) to the Arik flight debacle, it’s been a laughter filled day. But I’m here because Arik.

So, this flight was going from Lagos to New York. And the AC wasn’t working. Or wasn’t on. This here’s the link. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Al8DUddCFMI . Y’all can watch. But Lemme give you the highlights:

• the narrator with the shitty fake accent. Nigga lapsed into Yoruba sharply when the thing wasn’t flowing. The heat mustav cooked his tongue.

• the lady shouting “I was here in December! Same thing happened! Open the f****ing door! I noticed she didn’t take off her blazer, despite the heat.

• people shouting that they weren’t going again. As in ‘conduh, shilekun, a fe bo’le. We no dey go again’.

•A man shouting, ‘I’m not going again! Take me home! Is it by force?! ‘

•The people that wanted to open the emergency exit. Like they were gonna 007 and skydive the heck out of that shii!

• people trying to get into the cockpit. Presumably to fly the plane themselves.

• I also heard someone call an air hostess “Mrs cabin crew”

• I think at some point someone thought it was a terrorist hijacking.

I laughed. Oh my God, but I’ve laughed myself into a migraine. Nigerians. Nigerians. See people fanning themselves with precision, in various states of undress. The only people I didn’t understand were the people still in their suits and long sleeved shirts. Those ones have inherent AC.

Then to cap it all, this fellow on twitter comes and says they should have opened the windows after takeoff! LMFAO!!!!!! He said in the movie ‘snakes’, it was done. Hayyyyyy! Osanobua of the seven seas! Am I the only person that sees that warning before a movie starts:
“Stunts were performed in a controlled environment. Don’t try this at home”

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How can anyone be so gullible? So he believes Santa is real too?! Chineke ndi mmadu! I don die! Someone said that obviously the dude purchases pirated copies where the warnings are cut out! Looooooooool! Abeg abeg. I no dey dia o. Let nobody sue me for libel.

I leave you to imagine fifteen hours of armpit, farts, airborne infections, sweat, stale perfume, wet weaves,.etcetera. Not good enough Nigeria. Very sad.

I saw this too. The unfairness of this life. Poor kid.

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